mush

-
Sometimes I say a lot, and sometimes I keep it shut, It wasn't supposed to be this way. With breaking down, in middle of nights, and pouring my love onto pages. Lately, I think, that we keep getting clumsier as we grow up. I am still trying to figure out if that is okay or I end laughing at myself. When I was eight all I used to do is look up the lyrics of songs and memorize and even now when someone sings I sing along. I used to write all I wanted to do in life behind a diary.




 Human memory I believe is nerves and magic. We don't forget things. Sometimes we don't say things, rights things at the right time so we say wrong things at the wrong times. The wreckage we keep collecting is a kind of clutter, we need to get rid of it or tell the person responsible. Keeping it to yourself is not a good idea. I believe out of all the ways we can create art, telling stories is and will always be greatest. I remember people I love by the stories they told mostly. And I love people who tell me stories and mostly I enjoy listening to them, but sometimes I also have stories to tell, and I need people to listen. I fall in love with everyone who makes me want to write and I hate how far can I take it. I love storms, dust storms especially the ones that come unannounced, In the middle of the day, that kind of turn the blue sky into a feverish yellow. But I don't like storms that come in the night, or middle of the night, because when  I wake up I see haywire. Somedays or sometimes like daily I am all heart and cheesy songs swimming in cotton candy clouds. I love making lists, of all good and bad.  I don't write when I am sad and this line is an exception. Sometimes, I think I have felt happiest after a long day, coming back to an empty house, making tea for myself at 19:30, and on a call with someone to whom I could narrate my day. Just me, and the conversations on tea and the dusty lights. Lately every now and then I have been running out of things even when I have so much to tell, like one moment I have a plethora of things I can tell you and then boom next minute it's gone. Sometimes I liberate and put myself in tragedy by not believing in anything. Off all the naturally occurring elements in the world, I think the human heart weighs the heaviest.

Comments

  1. Unknown24 May 2020 at 08:30

    keep writing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Namarta Singh Jaryal6 August 2020 at 23:59

      I can't see your name , but thanks for the kind words. I shall for sure ;)

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

हमसफ़र

-
Image
 मेरे हमजोलिया मेरे बिछड़े हमसफ़र  कुछ ऐसे नाम लेके ये जहाँ मुझे छेड़ते सब यहाँ  किसे करूँ शिकायत ,किसे करू ये बयान  अब में जाऊ कहा  कभी मुस्कुराते हैं कभी सिमट जातें हैं   इस जहाँ की बातों पर और अपने जज़्बातो पर  तुम बस जल्दी आ जाओ  सावन गया ,  पतझड़ भी जाने को है  कुछ यहाँ कुछ वहां  कितने खुशनसीब हैं वो कान जो तेरी खैर रोज सुनते होंगे  कितने खुशनसीब है वो ऑंखें जो तेरा दीदार करती होगी  तेरे नाम लेकर लोग मेरा दिल जलाते हैं मेरा  आखिर कब होगा वो सवेरा जब तू  हाथ  थमेगा मेरा 
Read more

About your smile

-
Image
I am always thinking about your smile. Recreating the corners of your mouth, the crinkles around your eyes. Your memory comes and plays on loop in my head and I leave my heart in places in middle of the things. Every chance encounter, every change you had, you walked by, you are the only thing I see and yet you are only thing in my life that I didn’t see coming. The stillness that night was just the sky holding its breath for us. That late night when I was walking by your sid e, you were walking right next to me, I thought that one day maybe I will write about this. I laughed within myself. Wild tansies grew in my chest and it was just a way for my heart to say that look here, I acknowledge how different I am feeling. So, may be 10 years from now we run into each other and I know we will, I will say that you know I only met you today, but I have been in love with you since yesterday. Words are the most dangerous weapons we have or the sweetest fondest cupcakes. Onl...
Read more

Resurrection

-
Before I begin, I would want to tell you that writing or saying this makes me feel very scared. I always had this strange fear that If I write about good things, If I put my happiness in words and make it concrete, then it can be taken away from me, But as a writer of all things sad and dismal, I owe this one to you. So here it goes; I was a person who never cherished life, like the one where everyone is supposed to be grateful when nothing is wrong in their life, Past few months I was lost in a blur. One minute I was flying to a new location to do this or that, one minute I was working like a machine to get rid of all thoughts I create. I walked into the streets, I got failure and breaking points but all of this mattered and didn’t matter in the end too. Life took dramatic twists, and you can call it an unbecoming of all sorts. And this time I let it in, felt it, without fighting back too much. And this has let me write this on a grey winter afternoon at home, under a bare blue sky....
Read more