lukewarm love

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 I know if I call you today after sunset, you won't pick. Silence will grow and I will take a deep breath. Something inside my ribs would break and bleed and I won't have words for it. I just hope before I get short on blood my letters reach you if my voice could not. When in life you feel yourself strangling to death and there is

nothing you can do about it, you feel a kind of dizzy. Someone tried calling me today and checking on me and I wanted to pick I wanted to cry out loud but I cried in my head. And I hope it's alright.


This is incomplete.

Memories of lukewarm love, fugitive stains of broken songs playing loudly on the stereo, stolen kisses, and a drowsy drunk voice saying that I love you bangs in the head. Comforting silence of Monosyllabic replies. Turquoise sky pouring down the torrents of the light, a fuzzy tonic of bittersweet memories. I should have said everything. In the smell of nitroglycerin, hypochlorite, and peroxide I breathe in air and your name is first and last thing that my lungs would have space for.


I should have told you this
But I am writing this instead and I hope it's alright.

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